Would you invite someone to a wedding that didn't invite you?

Let's say you had a friend that didn't invite you to their wedding for whatever reason, but that person was ALSO friends with your significant other, fiancee, and they got invited but didn't want you to come.





Would you invite that person to your wedding, even if your fiancee wanted them to come because they were close?





what would you do in this situation?
Would you invite someone to a wedding that didn't invite you?
I would invite them, smile %26amp; then make a comment to her at the wedding reception:) I am also wondering (like others) why Peter did not stick up for you back then, and allowed this and is still friends with this couple, as this seems rude to him %26amp; you both. But yes, I would be the "bigger person now, but I'd get a dig in. If it's really bothering you though hun, put your bridal foot down %26amp; say "NO WAY" and cut them off (or her) and let Peter deal with it - he should have done so a year ago
Reply:Peter should have stuck up for Shelby and defended her first off. He needs to tell Jane/John that their action was completely uncalled for and if they are adults they should understand the situation they have created. I (as Shelby) would be pissed. It can be handled two ways. First, don't invite them because of what they did to you (Peter can deal with it now, since he didn't stick up for you then.) Or, secondly, be the bigger person and invite them and be sweet as pie to them. Go overboard and kill them with kindness. Many times that is the best option.
Reply:I wouldn't. It is your special day, you can invite whoever you wish. The general rule is, you are not obligated to invite someone who didn't invite you to their wedding.
Reply:After just reading the title i immediatly thought yes...





My aunt only invited me to her evening do, though my parents were at the day. When planning my own it didnt even cross my mind not to have her at the ceremony. I know she could only have 40 ish at the day and mine is 80 and i had a hard time limiting myself to that so i can imagine how she felt with only half that.





Your situation is totally different...





The bitchy side of me says i would just invite John and ditch jane... exactly what they did to you!! See how they like it!!!





My actual answer would be just to invite them... then casually mention at your reception... How does my wedding compare to yours? I cant remember what yours was like at all...





Make them feel bad for what they did. They should have had you there with your fiance or uninvite the other girl too at least.
Reply:Well, If the reason for not being invited to their wedding is the one you stated, then yeah I would be mad, and probaly would not want them at my wedding, especially since they invited my fiance. It seems a little rude to me to invite one person of a couple and not the other, considering proper ettiquite says that if a couple is in a serious relationship, living together, or engaged, then you need to invite both of them.
Reply:Tricky one. I know that my man would have said to me 'it's your day, and I can understand why you don't want them to come'. I sort of feel like the wedding is the brides day.





If they had 'uninvited' me to their wedding, I don't think I'd want them there - say that one of your guest has a problem with one of them and just invite one of them and see how they like it.





I think the way I would feel about it is: if they were *so* close to your fiance, then why was he not offended when they didn't want his fiancee at their wedding?
Reply:It is a wedding , the couple an invite whom ever they want or not , I feel there is no reason not to invite someone just because
Reply:You could hang onto your grudge for a good long time, or you could just let it go and let your fiancee invite his friend.
Reply:Yes I would, because I am not petty like that, and it's not all about the bride, it is the groom's day also. Sometimes I think it is better to be the adult, act like the adult and it puts the other couple to shame for being to small minded.
Reply:The bride and groom should be able to specify guests they would like to have invited. If the groom's friend has a wife or girlfriend, she should be allowed to come as his guest unless there is reason to believe she will make a big scene and ruin the wedding. Chances are, under the circumstances, she will decline the invitation. There is a possibility she will attend and everyone will get over the problem that previously existed and both couples can be friends.
Reply:That's terrible that they invited someone but told them their partner could not come. There are couples where i like one person but not the other but i would never have the nerve to only invite one of them and if anyone did it to me there would be no way they would be invited to my wedding. If i'm not good enough for them their not good enough for me!
Reply:Doing it for my fiancee'...the man I love and plan on spending the rest of my life with...the man I would do anything for? Yes I would invite them if that's what he wanted. I may not exactly be cordial, but I'd still invite them.
Reply:I would be royally ticked off. That's for sure. That said, invite them. You may not want to, you may not understand why your fiance wants to, but it shows you to be the mature and grown up one. To not invite someone because s/he and another guest wouldn't get along? Ridiculous! Depending on the guest list count, you may not even see them save for once when they congratulate you. And that's assuming they even come. It sounds like "Jane" is someone who needs to grown up and realize that high school is over. Be the bigger person. Its your day, but just let her see how happy you are and aren't letting her ruin it. Hey, you might even get a gift out of it! Good luck on this, I hope everything works out.
Reply:I think the Jane and John inviting Peter but not Shelby to their wedding due to one guest is rude.


My husband would have said to them either we both attend their wedding or neither of us do.


They wouldn't have been invited to our wedding because my husband wouldn't continue close contact with a couple that were so blantly rude to me and also, more indirectly to him.
Reply:i'm facing that delima myself.


i wasn't invited to 2 weddings of ppl that i'm inviting to mine





i don't feel that that means i/we care more about them then they do me/us


if they decline they decline, if they accept then that's 2 more ppl i/we care about that i/we get to share our special day with


we can afford to have them so i/we'll invite them.


if our budget was smaller i would cut them
Reply:Honestly, I would, then plan a better wedding than hers just to make her jealous.